Obituary of Margaret Amy MCGRUTHER (nee Lief)

February 3, 1925 – London, England

March 13, 2021 – Calgary, Alberta

 

 

'Beloved Is Where We Begin'

- Jan Richardson

 

Do not leave

without hearing

who you are:

Beloved

 

Margaret was born on February 3, 1925, in London, England of Quaker Parents, John “Bertie” Lief and Gertrude “Amy” Lief.

 

Margaret grew up in Sutton Coldfield, England. Her father had been a conscientious objector during WWI and found it difficult to find work after the war. Despite the economic temptation to send her teenage girls out to earn money for the family, her mother insisted Margaret and her sisters do well in school so that they could obtain scholarships and eventually attend teacher’s college or university. Margaret obtained a teaching certificate and while teaching school by day continued to study towards a degree in Classics by night. This pattern of learning continued throughout her life, and she took courses in mathematics, typing and shorthand, sewing and tailoring, languages (French and Spanish), art classes, Tai Chi, and later computers.

 

After a few years teaching in England, Margaret answered an advertisement for teachers in Montreal, Canada and immigrated. She taught for a year and then worked for Bell Telephone as an editor while taking courses at Sir George Williams College [Concordia]. She lived in Miss Harrison’s boarding house in Montreal and attended Montreal Friends Meeting on the weekends when she wasn’t skiing in the Christieville or camping and canoeing with the YMCA.

 

She met Frank at a Scottish Country Dancing group and they were married in 1958 under the care of the Montreal Monthly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers). After briefly working on a farm in Vermont, Frank had a desire to live out west and in 1961 they moved to Calgary. They rented a house with a large living room and hosted the local Scottish Country Dance group, and were founding members of the Royal Scottish Country Dance Society (Calgary Branch). Margaret cut down her wedding dress to be suitable for demonstration dancing, and the group danced in nursing homes and other venues.

 

In 1962, their daughter Rosemary was born, and in 1966 they bought their home in south-west Calgary where they lived until recently. Margaret returned to University and received her Bachelor of Education and returned to teaching in an elementary school. In 1972 she quit her job because of ill health, which was later diagnosed as celiac disease. This caused a severe drop in family income, but Margaret compensated by sewing and knitting family clothing, and with Frank, caring for a large vegetable garden and freezing and canning produce. It also meant a switch from downhill skiing to cross-country skiing, and they joined Bow Waters Canoe Club expeditions, skiing in the winters and canoeing and camping in the summers.

 

Margaret spent the rest of her life painting, volunteering and giving back to the community. She wrote letters for Amnesty International, volunteered with Project Ploughshares, and taught English as a Second Language. She volunteered at the Kirby Centre until she was 94, volunteering with the adult day program, as an assistant to the editor of Kerby News and helping seniors with tax preparation. She was very active with the Quakers, serving as clerk of Calgary Monthly Meeting and regularly attended Calgary Meetings, Western Half Yearly Meeting, and Canadian Yearly Meeting (in session). She hosted Meeting for Worship for Business in her home for many years. Sometime in the 1980s, she and Rossanne Moore wrote a history of Quakers in Calgary, which we have posted on our website.

 

When Frank retired, they travelled: visiting family in Ontario and England, and friends in Andorra. They went canoeing in the Broken Islands off the BC coast and sailed around Vancouver Island with friends. They backpacked over Earl Grey Pass with a Quaker group. They travelled with the Cal-O-Rail model railway club, of which Frank was a member, travelling to see trains and rode the Via Rail train from Winnipeg to Churchill, Manitoba. They took art classes, and joined the Calgary Sketch Club, filling their home with their paintings. They kept fit doing exercise classes at Kerby Centre and co-founded the Grace Tai Chi Group.

 

Margaret continued to live in their house after Frank died. When she was 91 she had a hip replacement, and although friends were worried that this might sideline her, she returned home and resumed hiking with friends. We should have known better. As a child, she taught herself to ride a men’s bicycle by canting it to the side and putting her leg under the crossbar. She was a quietly strong and determined woman.

 

Margaret was a careful and meticulous woman, relied on to catch errors in Quaker minutes and the Kerby News, and accurately processing taxes. She was modest so that many of her friends did not know of her wide-ranging interests and education. She was thoughtful of others, ensuring that visiting children had toys to play with, the clerk had a footstool during Meeting for Worship for Business, and had a collection of tea to satisfy everyone. She was well known for her delicious gluten-free macaroni and cheese which she brought to all the potlucks. She loved the outdoors and continued hiking and learning about botany and birds until very late in her life.

 

Margaret devoted much of her life to volunteering for organizations that helped others. She will be missed by her many friends and her family.

 

Margaret is survived by her daughter Rosemary McGruther (David Ross), grandchildren, Claire Rose and Garett Ross; and two sisters, Fiona Lief and Esther Large. She was predeceased by her husband W. Frank McGruther in 2014.

 

Introduction to a Quaker Memorial Meeting

 

For Quakers, a memorial service is a Meeting for Worship, based on silence and the sure conviction of the unseen presence in our midst. All present are invited to enter into silent worship, seeking that still small place within us where the Light shines. The silence may be broken by anyone wishing to share a reflection, a memory, a song, or a reading. Please allow a period of silence between each message so that we may feel that place from whence it comes.

 

A Quaker Memorial Meeting to honour Margaret’s life will be held on Sunday, March 21 at 3:30 p.m. on Zoom. Those wishing to participate in the Memorial Meeting may join via, https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89807101868?pwd=elo4RjI2WUZpaEc3a0ZQN3QzV3lvdz09, Meeting ID: 898 0710 1868, Passcode: 505901 or through the Calgary Quaker Website at www.calgaryquakers.org. For those who are unable to join us on Zoom, a recording of the service will be posted below as soon as it is available. In lieu of flowers, Margaret requested charitable donations be made directly to the Calgary Monthly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers), or to a charity of your choice.

 

In living memory of Margaret McGruther, a tree will be planted in the Ann & Sandy Cross Conservation Area by McINNIS & HOLLOWAY FUNERAL HOMES, Chapel of the Bells, 2720 CENTRE STREET NORTH, CALGARY, AB T2E 2V6, Telephone: 403-243-8200.