Obituary of Lilly Stokes

June 8, 1934 – Barashi, Ukraine
December 12, 2022 – Calgary, Alberta

It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of our mother, Lilly Stokes, who passed away peacefully at home on Monday, December 12, 2022 at the age of 88 years.

Mom’s life had many facets beginning with her family’s suffering under the rule of Joseph Stalin and then at the hands of the Nazis. Despite those difficult years, Mom was always happy and very positive throughout her life. She was a great storyteller with a story for everything. Mom loved to talk and share her stories.

Born in Barashi, Ukraine in 1934, Mom lived there with her older sister Irene and their parents Eduard and Emilie Dorn. Her stories about her life in Barashi was a chronicle about life under Stalin.

Considered ethnic Germans, Mom and her family were relocated in 1942 by soldiers from the Wehrmacht (German Army). Mom and her family were moved from Barashi to Slawa, Poland. In September 1943 they were ordered by two German officers “to be in the next town by tomorrow morning to be ready to be moved to Germany as the Fatherland needs workers”. This was the start of their life as part of the German Forced Labour.

After a long trek by horse and wagon, and sometimes on foot, they arrived at a field somewhere in Poland where they lived outdoors until they were eventually loaded into boxcars on a train. Mom and her family arrived in Waltershausen, Turin (Thuringia) in Germany in early November in 1943 where they were moved into a larger work camp.

While Eduard worked in carpentry and Emilie sewed German uniforms in a factory, Mom and her sister had minimal schooling and did some odd jobs in the camp. This was their life until May 1945 when the US Army arrived and occupied Waltershausen. They were given the opportunity to leave if they had somewhere to go. Mom’s parents decided to stay in Waltershausen where they could live as unpaid workers on a farm near the camp.

They eventually found paid work, saved enough money, and moved the family to the village of Werhda. They found work on a farm, lived above the chicken coop, and Mom’s new life of farm chores, exploring Werhda, and attending the village school and church gave rise to many new stories.

After finishing her education at the village school Mom began her apprenticeship in dressmaking and design and she qualified for her journeyman papers and diploma upon completing her studies. 

In 1954 Mom and her parents immigrated to Canada, following Irene who had been living in Alberta for several years. They came to Canada on the ship the Rosa Kohn. It was only after they were on board and underway that they learned that this was her last voyage. The Rosa Kohn was destined for the scrap heap after arriving in Canada. This sailing trip appeared in many of Mom’s stories and was the reason she refused to ever go on a cruise. She said that the trip on the Rosa Kohn was enough sailing for one lifetime.

After landing and being processed at Pier 21 in Halifax, the Dorns began their travels across Canada by immigrant train to join Irene in Calgary. It was February 1954 and bitterly cold. As they sat staring at the cold and bleak winter landscape while crossing the prairies, her father declared that when they arrived in Calgary they would get jobs, save money, and move back to Germany. However, Canada became home, and other than some trips back to Germany, the entire family lived here for the rest of their lives.

Mom’s only English upon arrival in Canada was a rhyme Mr. Brown, Mr. Brown. Are you going downtown? There were no ESL classes or supports for new immigrants as there are today, but Mom, always eager to learn, taught herself to speak, read and write in English. She never hesitated to express herself in her new language and wrote and spoke about her concerns to politicians at all levels of government, confidently spoke in public, and eventually volunteered as a tour guide for The City of Calgary’s new Municipal Building. Her great sense of humor served her well if she used the wrong word or pronunciation. She would laugh along with everyone else.

Upon moving to Calgary Mom had a variety of jobs, including nanny and diner counter waitress, until she finally landed work in alterations. She worked at Julliard’s of Calgary, Daytons Fashions, Miss Country Club Kingsland, and Elaine Kinney. She must have sewn the equivalent of thousands of miles on machines at work and at home. One of her proudest moments was being selected as a finalist in the first Annual Kiwanis Fashion Festival held in 1986 with her entry of three original designs.

In 1955 Mom met Ronald Stokes on a blind date and they were married on September 29th, 1956. They had two daughters, Carol and Lindae, and were married for just over 60 years until Ronnie’s death in March 2017.

Mom was always active in her community and volunteered in many ways. However, her proudest volunteer moment was working as an interpreter for the Mayor’s Protocol Office during the 1988 Olympic Winter Games in Calgary. She was the interpreter for Dr. Luger who was in Calgary from Austria for the entire games.

Lilly is survived by her daughters, Carol and Lindae Stokes; nephew, Gordon (Nikki) Holden; as well as her family and friends in Calgary, Germany, England, and Australia. She was predeceased by her husband Ronnie Stokes, her little sister Marianne (who died in 1948 at age 3), parents Eduard and Emelia Dorn, brother-in-law Helmut Holden, and her older sister Irene Holden. 

Condolences, memories, and photos can also be shared and viewed here.

Funeral Services will be set for a later date.

If friends so desire, please consider making a donation in Mom’s name to the Alzheimer Society of Calgary, 800, 7015 Macleod Trail S.W., Calgary, AB T2H 2K6, Telephone: (403)290-0110, www.alzheimercalgary.com. 

We are very grateful for the excellent and loving care Mom received from her long-time caregiver Jenniffer Robinson and from respite caregivers, Suela Carino and Marina Gendreau. Mom was able to remain at home, her strongest desire, because of you.

We will miss you, Mom, but know that wherever you are many stories are being told.

In living memory of Lilly Stokes, a tree will be planted in the Ann & Sandy Cross Conservation Area by McInnis & Holloway Funeral Homes, Park Memorial, 5008 Elbow Drive SW, Calgary, AB T2S 2L5, Telephone: 403-243-8200.