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Condolences
Sweet Tanechia
So very sad to be here
To say our last goodbyes
Our hearts are broke the calm is shattered
It's hard to keep dry eyes.
Remembering, the very,
Worst day of our lives
Those Emotions times one thousand
For numbness you did strive
Your love for life was diminished
You fought it, by the hour
The darkness that cast that shadow
Sometimes took, all of your power.
To us that never experienced
The emotion that you toiled
It takes a great deal to understand
The trauma that kept you foiled
Beyond all the negative data
That follows this mental strife
You wanted to be a whole person
As you were fighting for your life
In shades of deep complexity,
The story for you unfolds
Borderline then whispers
“There are secrets, still untold”
Borderline Personality Disorder
As horrible as it is
It may seem odd to say it
But it has some advantages
Beyond all of the struggles
That were so often seenq
We had a glimpse of hidden gems
Deep in your souls ravine
Your Passion:
A whirlwind of your passion
So fierce and oh so bold
That torrent of uneasy feelings
That couldn't be controlled I
When you found a real passion
You wholehearted made you claims
You loved and knew all the statistics
Of your favourite Calgary Flames
BPD ignites that flame,
That fervently burns within
Your passion dampened by its heat
So much to your chagrin
In the midst of all your chaos
Growth was, taking its time
Your Self-discovery journey
Would be archaically sublime
Resilience:
Emotional warfare daily
Outburst because of it
Beating up you put yourself down
Tanechia, none of it was legit
We know at times you'd lose it
Sometimes wanting to end it all
Resilience had you bounce right back
Family caught you when you’d fall
The fighting heart that endured those storms
Weathering trials of plenty
You got yourself up to meet those days,
In spite of feeling, so empty
Resilience forged through trials endured
Your warriors spirit shown
If given just a few more years
You'd have seen that you weren’t alone
Creative Channeling:
The canvas of most thoughts of ours,
A most vivid colourful array
Borderline Personalities Canvas?
Your colours were acutely grey
CBT and DBT
You had them both in hand
Hard work for when you chose it
You could have calmly made your stand
We got to see every side of you
Your Impressive lipsync prowess
Humour, pain and anger
Your energy was boundless
When at your darkest moments
You channelled that into art
You made fantastic Videos
Mom says, “Tic Tok did its part”
Empathy:
Your heart ablaze with empathy’s fire
You helped ones when you could
Feeling so very deeply
Often a way more than you should
A change in the voice, a wince on the face
You were so intuitive
Your empathy was so much more
Oh how we wanted you to live
Loved With Whole Being
Bonds that formed, some good some bad
That bond from you untold
Intense connections for honest love
Your poor little heart did hold
When someone says they love you
When someone says they cared
No one understood those words
As wholeheartedly as you dared
Self Aware:
Depression, Anxiety the emptiness
Acute, you knew it was more
Self aware, you sought the help
Your diagnosis showed us your horror
Deaden Deaden Deaden
A must when times got tough
We are all so very sorry that
You thought you weren't enough.
So sad you couldn't get beyond
The screaming in your brain
The addiction, yes we understand
Selfmedicating to you, seemed sane
Sometimes it comes in circumstance
Sometimes it’s made by choice
My hope is we can stand up,
And somehow be your voice.
We know you didn't mean
To end your life like this
Your college and your business plan
For this was not remiss
Struggles that cast that shadow
Your mind without real sound
A flash, a beacon of a wonderful hope
Could balance, that uncertain ground
So glad that you had started
To search for your higher power
He was just within your reach
Sweet Girl, he would have been your tower.
Proud of starting your God quest
Your family did not groan
Known for your Fact checking
HE would have brought you all the way home.
The Good Book says there’s a ressurection.
To this most of us hold dear
We look forward to the next time
Your beautiful voice to hear.
Sleep Well our Little Warrior
Mind and heart are now at peace
We look toward that brand new day
When deaths grip on you, released
We will love you
Always our
Little Warrior Princess
Auntie Sherry
I’ll never forget all the time we spent over the years. The times in hope barreling down that hill on tubes and crazy carpets. All the times in Calgary harassing you and Rae. Then later in life as adults, relating to each other and our long talks. I’ll miss you kid!! I’ll always love you!!
I still can’t believe this is our new reality with out our beautiful girl! Its so hard talking about her like shes not here anymore and continue with daily chores and responsibilities with all these waves of memories and emotions.I miss her so much and wish so much that i could talk to her one more time and tell her how much she matters to us all.
I was always on awe of Tanechias style when she dressed up with her big hoop earrings, converse, sunglasses and hats she could pull off every style and loved to dress up! I remember lots of dress up dance parties and concerts when we were kids and we had so much fun. I worked with her at a fish farm for the summers in hope when we were young and we would hang out with the owners girls after work all the time singing and listening to music. As we got older we went to some heavy metal concerts together and I remember thinking she was way to fragile to go smash around with the crazy’s and tried to stay with her but eventually we got split up and when i found her later she had the biggest smile on her face and was thrilled to be there. Music has been always been Tanechias happy place and she loved all types.
Tanechia was such an amazing mom! Her girls were her life. I remember when we got back to Calgary after a long trip home from the island we were up early every day preparing healthy meals and planning a day that we could take turns walking with the girls and working out. Everyday we would make sure we took time to talk to the girls and go to the park or go to the little man made lake that was blocks from their house. Its so easy to get caught up in the day to day and not take the time to spend with the kids having fun. Tanechia was always doing fun things with the girls and feeding them healthy meals, those girls had the healthiest luches for school and Tan prided herself on how good she took care of her babies. Im so so happy we have so many pictures and videos of Tanechia so we can always remember how funny she was and her contagious laugh! I love her laugh! There are endless pictures and videos of Tanechia with her girls and I'm so happy they can watch those videos anytime and remember mama. I will always be here for my two beautiful cousins as long as i live, anytime you girls need anything I'm just a phone call away my little lovies.
Rest in peace my smart, beautiful, stylish, funny, sweet girl we all miss you sooo much!
Tanechia and Mariah came to stay at my place in Edmonton.
Tanechia and Rae decided to sneak out at night and by 5 in the morning I heard them sneaking back in giggling.
I let the get all comfy in their bed and waited until they had slept for 1/2 an hour.
I then woke them both up, told them that I was up all night waiting for them so now, they could spend the next few hours waiting on me, picking the weeds out of my garden!!!
Haha,
Their annoyance was my pleasure!! Lol
Mariah even went to help them because she felt sorry for them!
I didn't!
Oh the many experience with you my girl.
So very heartbroken.
One of my favourite memories with Tanechia was listening to the Aqua album and dancing to Come on Barbie (when we were probably a little young to be listening to it) at Aunty Colleen and Uncle Eron’ sin Hope, BC. I always loved visiting Hope because I knew we would have fun and play a lot ❤️ Tanechia always showed up smiling even when she was hurting inside. She loved music so much. I know we bonded over that ❤️ rest in peace, sweet cousin. This world was never meant for one as beautiful as you (from Vincent, by Don McLean).
This isn't mine, but appropriate. Love You Colleen and Sean.
“Stay strong, my friends, because our LORD is mixing several things that we don't really care for, but something even better is going to come when HE is done with it. “
A pastor asked an older farmer, decked out in bib overalls, to say grace for the morning breakfast.
"Lord, I hate buttermilk", the farmer began. The visiting pastor opened one eye to glance at the farmer and wonder where this was going.
The farmer loudly proclaimed, "Lord, I hate lard." Now the pastor was growing concerned.
Without missing a beat, the farmer continued, "And Lord, you know I don't much care for raw white flour". The pastor once again opened an eye to glance around the room and saw that he wasn't the only one to feel uncomfortable.
Then the farmer added, "But Lord, when you mix them all together and bake them, I do love warm fresh biscuits. So Lord, when things come up that we don't like, when life gets hard, when we don't understand what you're saying to us, help us to just relax and wait until you are done mixing. It will probably be even better than biscuits. Amen."
Within that prayer there is great wisdom for all when it comes to complicated situations like we are experiencing in the world today.
A pastor asked an older farmer, decked out in bib overalls, to say grace for the morning breakfast.
"Lord, I hate buttermilk", the farmer began. The visiting pastor opened one eye to glance at the farmer and wonder where this was going.
The farmer loudly proclaimed, "Lord, I hate lard." Now the pastor was growing concerned.
Without missing a beat, the farmer continued, "And Lord, you know I don't much care for raw white flour". The pastor once again opened an eye to glance around the room and saw that he wasn't the only one to feel uncomfortable.
Then the farmer added, "But Lord, when you mix them all together and bake them, I do love warm fresh biscuits. So Lord, when things come up that we don't like, when life gets hard, when we don't understand what you're saying to us, help us to just relax and wait until you are done mixing. It will probably be even better than biscuits. Amen."
Within that prayer there is great wisdom for all when it comes to complicated situations like we are experiencing in the world today.
Stay strong, my friends, because our LORD is mixing several things that we don't really care for, but something even better is going to come when HE is done with it. AMEN!
Oh Tanni you were the sweetest cutest big brown eyed little girl ever ❤️ visiting and staying with you guys over the years , you had the cutest sayings and I loved seeing when you were all dressed up in your little dresses and had that spunk . You grew up to be a strong beautiful woman who made the cutest little spunky girls just like you were . We are thinking of all your family and loved ones at this time of sorrow as there will be a great hole in everyone’s hearts without you . Love you all very much xo till we get to hug again some day my sweet cousin ❤️
Tanechia always had such a sense of style.
Out at our house in the country when she was 3-4 years old.
Sherry: Ok you kids get those coats on and get outside.
Tanechia: Auntie, I can't wear that coat.
Sherry: Why not?
Tanechia: Because it's sooooo ugly!!!!
I'll never forget you sweet girl.
Love you so much,
Auntie Sherry
My Sweet Colleen, Sean, Mariah, Eron and Tanechia’s sweet girls, Saala and Ivy and their daddy Jordon,
I can not express the sadness that overflows for the loss of our beautiful Tanechia.
Her horrible struggle is over.
So glad you can now rest in peace (your ultimate mental health goal).
Sleep well little one, your sleep won't be long now. GOD is going to gently wake you up to that beautiful paradise promise centuries ago.
Until we meet again My Love.
Auntie Sherry
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